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167: Debra Fileta

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Today on Thriving Beyond Belief, we have Debra Fileta!

According to Fileta, people tend to assume they’re okay—until they’re not. Becoming healthy is an ongoing process that requires stopping, digging deep and asking the hard questions.

In her new book, Fileta challenges readers to get real with who they are and how they’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so they can recognize where they need growth and healing. Readers will learn to…

  • Understand and express emotions in healthy and helpful ways
  • Get to the root of what they believe about themselves, others, and God
  • Recognize the influences of past traumas and replace them with God’s truth
  • Honestly assess their own mental health and pursue help when it’s needed
  • Prioritize their physical well-being and see how it affects every other area of their life
  • Combat commonly believed lies about mental illness such as “true believers don’t suffer from
    depression”
  • Say “no” and set up healthy boundaries

Fileta knows firsthand that being a Christian doesn’t automatically make a person healthy. After 10+ years of marriage, 15 years of counseling clients, and four and a half books (she’s currently cowriting one with Gary Thomas), she not only possesses the knowledge and experience to coach readers on their journey to becoming more than okay––she has the heart for it. In Are You Really Okay? Fileta reveals some of her own traumas for the first time in print, including a miscarriage that nearly killed her and her deep struggles with both anxiety and depression––writing to her readers as if she were talking to a close friend and yet counseling them with the professional tools they need.

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124: Alison Cook, PhD

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This week on the Thriving Beyond Belief podcast: Alison Cook, PhD

Alison Cook, MA, PhD is a counselor, speaker, and writer who helps people become comfortable in their own skin and fully live out their God-given potential. She is the co-author of Boundaries for Your Soul (Thomas Nelson, 2018). Alison is uniquely gifted at helping people learn how to:

  • Develop confidence from the inside out
  • Transform anxiety and loneliness into peace and connection with others
  • Turn off the internal negative voice and experience the true loving God who isn’t trying to beat you up
  • Heal lingering trauma from childhood wounds or abuse
  • Forge healthy relationships with safe individuals

For over 20 years, Alison has helped create transformative results for women, ministry leaders, couples, and families. Alison’s Christian adaptation of the fast growing, evidence-based Internal Family System (IFS) model of therapy provides a step-by-step approach to managing emotions in partnership with God. Prior to her work in counseling, Alison was a congressional aid on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C. and taught at Phillips Exeter Academy, Denver Seminary, and the Wyoming State Girls’ School for adjudicated teens. Some of Alison’s most valuable life lessons were discovered while stage acting as a hobby.

Originally from Wyoming, Alison obtained a degree in history from Dartmouth College. She then earned her M.A. in counseling from Denver Seminary and a Ph.D. in religion and psychology from the University of Denver. Alison’s doctoral dissertation centered on the relationship between religion and prejudice. She is certified in Internal Family Systems Therapy.

Alison maintains a counseling practice in the greater Boston area that specializes in the integration of faith and psychology. She and her husband, Joe, have two teenage children and enjoy spending time with extended family in New England and Wyoming where they ski, hike, and fly-fish as often as they can.

So can I really turn my emotions into allies?

  1. Do we all have overwhelming thoughts and feelings?
  2. How do I deal with negative emotions?
  3. How do I know an emotion has gotten extreme? How do emotions affect my actions and behaviors and the people I love?
  4. What does it mean to set boundaries with thoughts and feelings?
  5. In your book, you walk through 5 steps to turning your overwhelming thoughts and feelings into your greatest allies. Briefly, what are they?
  6. You mention turning anger into an ally. How can this be? What does that look like? Sound like?
  7. What about anxiety?  fear? envy? etc?
  8. How can I communicate with my loved one (spouse, child, friend) about what I’m feeling without blowing up the relationship?

 

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